Too much text before first question/action point. Too much text before second one, didn't get that far until got frustrated and quit game. What I read was nicely written, though.
It's less of a game and more of an interactive story with 1 option. I'm afraid I can't fully appreciate the work that went into this, as I don't think I can commit to reading so much, sorry :) I see some nice images and coloring, would love more of that.
One choice? That doesn't do anything, just changes one sentence (I've checked the source)? That is all? You were supposed to make a game you know, not write a shortstory with some quick illustrations.
Yay! More Ren'Py Games! You have the bones of a good story here. I like the idea of using bravery and sanity. The writing could be tightened up and add a few more choices along the line. Maybe one at each body part?
I am also of the opinion that calling this a "game" is too far-stretched. However, I liked the story and it was very well written. It would be even better with different background musics, as it was a bit too repetitive. The background images were simple but had a good effect.
Comments7
You were supposed to make a game you know, not write a shortstory with some quick illustrations.
You have the bones of a good story here. I like the idea of using bravery and sanity. The writing could be tightened up and add a few more choices along the line. Maybe one at each body part?
Good job on the graphics.
Susan
Susan