Grow My Thing

Overall★★★★★★★★★★3.25
Fun★★★★★★★★★★3.38
Innovation★★★★★★★★★★3.21
Theme★★★★★★★★★★3.99
Graphics★★★★★★★★★★3.29
Humor★★★★★★★★★★4.01
Mood★★★★★★★★★★2.93
Coolness★★★★★★★★★★100%
Things got pretty strange here, but I hope everyone can figure out how to play anyway. Just use your mouse to move around and shoot with your unconventional weapon. The more you destroy, the more you grow.

Let me know your high-scores in the comments - I got 34 inches ;)

EDIT: It's amazing on iPad with one player holding the thing and the other player firing it :D

screenshot

Comments66

mike110119 Apr 2015, 22:37
Oh man, that's hilarious. Top points for Unconventional Weapon. Made me super uncomfortable :)

Not sure this is a constructive point but I ended up just playing the dick above the hilter heads as it's the only way to ensure I hit them. Which felt silly after a while ... Though I appreciate the wobbliness is part of the humour.
ppvk
ppvk20 Apr 2015, 01:22
While unconventional in general, there seems to be a few dick references in this LD. That being said, technically impressive.
Evgiz20 Apr 2015, 06:24
Hahah this is hilarious!! Fits the theme really well. Gameplay is fun due to the special physics of the weapon, love the music too. Decent graphics and gave me a good laugh! Keep up the good work!
C#20 Apr 2015, 06:25
Okay.

(It was a nice surprise that this game was pretty interesting)
RobotHoboDanceParty20 Apr 2015, 06:30
Super simple and hilarious game! Though the game becomes near impossible at around at a score of 50 (inches?), its still pretty damn great to play. Great work!
Jordan
Jordan20 Apr 2015, 06:32
The physics of said "thing" add a fun element to the game,
but I think it could be somewhat harder, e.g spawning more "nazis".

I got to a high score of 50.
GTA LUDUM V20 Apr 2015, 06:56
NSFW and hilarious in the same time!!
Armanky
Armanky20 Apr 2015, 06:56
If anybody worries their idea will be too offensive, I will show them your game. This is art.
OnErrorResumeNext20 Apr 2015, 06:58
Ok... I have to say that I enjoyed the gameplay. Little bit corny, but fun.
Jaenis20 Apr 2015, 06:59
That was "unconventional" indeed :D
I'd liked if you would have been able to whip enemies dead also. (that could make you shorter and game would last longer)
Jonathan Porta20 Apr 2015, 07:01
Saw the name, knew it couldn't be "that" thing, but secretly hoped it would be. It was.
SilentNight20 Apr 2015, 08:07
You know, I saw this game and I was like wow this is kind of silly. Then I played it and it was hella fun. Definitely an unconventional weapon.
fluidvolt
fluidvolt20 Apr 2015, 08:07
I couldn't figure out how to reliably damage the Hitler heads... but this is kinda great? Really funny, in a super distasteful (by that I mean good) way. I will say also: nice, um, stretchy dick physics. Never thought I'd say that sentence.
AlexanderTeaH
AlexanderTeaH20 Apr 2015, 08:09
It hits bang on with the theme and the music was quite good, but the nazi references kind of put me off. That being said, the dick thing was hilarious.
texdata20 Apr 2015, 09:03
hhahah nice !
TheBigShot20 Apr 2015, 09:12
Very Very unconventional. Decent game. ade me kind aunconfortable while playing. BUt games should envoke a response from the player and this certainly did. Good execution.
rg_rem20 Apr 2015, 11:33
I knew this game should be
Malsanity
Malsanity20 Apr 2015, 11:39
Humour of a 4 year old. Good technical skills, but misused
Flygamer101
Flygamer10120 Apr 2015, 12:40
Hilariously inappropriate theme, i enjoyed the music, but it was confusing due to the fact there were no instructions. Made me laugh however.
cgriff20 Apr 2015, 12:45
I like the way you can rest "it" on the platform to get a horizontal shoot angle, and the Noby Noby-style grow mechanic. An interesting (if a little disturbing) game.
strong99
strong9920 Apr 2015, 13:43
Awkward, but rather fun combined with the physics of the gun. Clean graphics. Nice.
Fanttum
Fanttum20 Apr 2015, 14:35
Might be the best dick game of this LD, and yea, there are a few others...
Jacob Eriksson20 Apr 2015, 14:41
I don't really know what to say. The theme and gameplay were great, but the game left me very uncomfortable.
fabsenet
fabsenet20 Apr 2015, 15:47
This is the best game I rated in this contest so far. I really enjoyed it but I have the feeling it is not really safe for work :)

I like how you can put it on the ground and how it naturally get harder to player the longer he is.
Buko-Studios
Buko-Studios20 Apr 2015, 16:09
lol! this is so hilarious! ejoyed growing the thing esp when it went all waggy and dangly while shooting. good art too!
Suvidriel
Suvidriel20 Apr 2015, 16:30
What the hell did I just play :D

Nice musics :)
maunovaha20 Apr 2015, 17:01
Lol.. first game which truly fits the theme. Hah. What did I just play?
Havacore
Havacore20 Apr 2015, 17:58
I got to around 45 inches, but the game starts to kinda break after 35ish, since after that you're just trying to arrange it so that the dick lies on the sidewalk to shoot all the hitlers.

And that is something I just said about a game...
dlowe
dlowe20 Apr 2015, 20:16
O_o
Raimonds20 Apr 2015, 20:40
Weird but fun use of theme. :D Did not see this coming.
esayitch20 Apr 2015, 21:15
31 inches. If only [Cries].

I must say, FINALLY a game where the unconventional weapon BEHAVES differently as opposed to just looks like an unconventional weapon. +Points for that.
You should add a powerup that makes the penis smaller so it's easier to shoot, since gaining size is in essence gaining difficulty.

Graphics are great, sound is just fantastic, very solid entry, only beef is its lack of content.

Good luck!
Split82
Split8220 Apr 2015, 23:22
OMG! :D Great use of theme.
Ilseroth
Ilseroth20 Apr 2015, 23:27
I have no words honestly.
peterkirk
peterkirk20 Apr 2015, 23:39
You really put an emphasis on the unconventional in Unconventional Weapon. The mechanic of having the "weapon" getting closer to the ground and more difficult to aim with each point is brilliant.
RandyOrenstein21 Apr 2015, 00:44
I am happy we are of a kindred spirit. Check out the Rod of God :)
thumbgarden
thumbgarden21 Apr 2015, 00:47
Dude this is hilarious. 10/10 dick physics haha
LTPATS21 Apr 2015, 03:35
This was great. The dick physics were really good and the growth mechanic made for a very natural difficulty curve. Reached 59 inches personally, it got pretty ridiculous after around 30-40 inches. Overall I enjoyed it a lot, great work!
EwChap
EwChap21 Apr 2015, 04:20
Hilarious and terrible. Also a fun to play game.
cgmorton21 Apr 2015, 04:21
45 inches is where it gets impossible, but I still made it to 54 by flopping down and spamming.
internetpaulicy21 Apr 2015, 04:29
I reached an amazing 36 inches! What fun. The music is somehow fitting if thats even possible. One of the best entries. It would be amazing if you were able to win :). Good luck.
wg_phancock21 Apr 2015, 06:39
You know, dick jokes aside, it's a pretty fun little game. Sort of like "snake" meets "space invaders" or something. The physics on the phallus (ooh alliteration) are also quite impressive.

However, it could have been anything other than a dick and probably still as fun, though maybe not as juvenile-funny.
Bitterdeath21 Apr 2015, 07:06
TIL shooting Hitler heads stored in glass jars with a 41 inch floppy wang can be challenging, hilarious and fun.
chipcaramel
chipcaramel21 Apr 2015, 11:43
Pissing lasers at Hitler while wielding a 50 inch dick. I don't know if I wanna close it and throw my computer into a furnace or push this towards Greenlight. I will say this: Good job on making something this catchy, confusing, and fun!
Ossi21 Apr 2015, 17:51
Yep that weapon is truly unconventional. Very challenging and pretty darn funny. Great job!
SadSmile21 Apr 2015, 19:57
Pretty funny, but for my taste a little bit to offensive.
Still a good game
DragonXVI
DragonXVI21 Apr 2015, 19:59
Well that was certainly unconventional :p
40 inches!
sP0CkEr222 Apr 2015, 03:28
off the charts! whats amazing is that it played like a real game - nice job
rojo
rojo22 Apr 2015, 03:34
Lol. This game, like Mount Your Friends, proves that dangly parts are hilarious! I got up to 53 inches. It'd be cool if there was a way to more reliably play after your thing gets huge.
jackrugile
jackrugile23 Apr 2015, 03:14
46 inches! Nice game ;)
benmcnelly
benmcnelly24 Apr 2015, 01:34
The longer you play the harder it gets. The game. The game is more difficult.
Tijn26 Apr 2015, 19:57
Haha, as someone else already said, both NSFW and pretty fun. Good job on how well the game is made. It feels really polished! Wait, that didn't came out right.
marinalucio27 Apr 2015, 07:30
I never thought controlling a ever growing dick to kill hitler would be so hard (pun intended).

Nice idea!
ChronusZ
ChronusZ28 Apr 2015, 02:40
Gonna have to pull out of this one. I think your game came first. I'll just hang my head in shame. I guess I'll ejaculate the area now. I mean evacuate.
w1n5t0n11 May 2015, 13:47
It was really fun but what the f* was that!
jhell11 May 2015, 13:50
It's uh... original ^^. Would have been cool to have some life indicator. Graphics are crisp, the dick's wobbliness is well done if not a bit extreme.
jmborden11 May 2015, 14:58
41 inches and my dick is so long it falls on the floor.
elpaulo11 May 2015, 15:05
Wow, finally a game where i can do the "Helico-bite" in french ^^
The Capitalist Crayfish
The Capitalist Crayfish11 May 2015, 15:34
After a while my dick hung from the atmosphere of the moon to the ground. I'd give this game six stars in realism, if there were such a category. Nice job. -Weloxux
infernalad11 May 2015, 16:31
10/10 would grow 33 inch dick again :D
rogueNoodle
rogueNoodle11 May 2015, 20:27
Silly, but honestly, pretty fun. Feel weird even suggesting ways to take this further, but maybe some powerups? Also, a more vertically oriented screen might allow for higher/longer scores :P

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